How To Have Intimacy : 12 Things You Should Never Do While Having Intimacy And 5 Things You Should
When you’re in bed with your lover, the last thing you want to do is turn them off. Not everyone is clear on his mind on how to have sex which feels great. That said, here are a few common blunders that you should not commit.
1. Not kissing
Believe it or not, many people (and this includes women) don’t kiss their partner when they’re having sex. Why? Perhaps because the positioning doesn’t allow for it or they are too eager to climax and feel that it might break the rhythm. Nevertheless, it is highly recommended that you make an effort to kiss your partner during the act – it will only add to the experience.
2. Biting before your partner’s ready While many people enjoy an aggressive partner, biting any part of their body before they are aroused may lead to pain and discomfort (and might even lessen the chances of any further action ) or simply scare them off. So make sure your partner is fully excited before you bite their ear, shoulders, neck or any other part of their body.
3. Ignoring everything but sexualised parts
Genitals are great, no doubt, but you should definitely pay attention to other parts of your lover’s body and focus for some time on their entire body – knees, wrists, back and stomach are highly erogenous zones for men as well as women. Gently caressing these areas will help excite your partner further; in turn, increasing the chances of them pleasuring you back.
4. Putting your weight on your partner
Even if you’re a girl! It’s okay to lose yourself in the moment every once in a while and go crazy on your lover. But when you’re lying on top of them, you have to be careful not to drop your weight on them. Chocking them or hindering their ability to breathe will anyway kill the moment and any chances of some good action.
5. Climaxing too soon/ too late
This one is especially for men. You need to have good control on your muscles to ensure that you can ejaculate at an appropriate time. Too soon and you may leave your partner unsatisfied; too late and it might leave your partner feeling as if they’re pumping iron at the gym. To avoid this, spend a lot more time on foreplay (this will help men as well as women). If you take too long and can only ejaculate via manual stimulation, do your best to get your partner to orgasm and then they can return you the favour.
6. Not warning your partner before you climax
If you’re going to let go – and this applies even to women – whether during oral sex or intercourse, you need to tell your partner beforehand. Something as simple as “I’m going to let go,” will suffice. Your partner deserves to know.
7. Treating sex like porn
Although some couples enjoy having raunchy sex, you’d be wise to talk to your partner before you engage in such behaviour. If you begin being nasty with your lover without knowing if they like it first, chances are the scenario won’t end on a happy note.
8. Staying quiet
Do you like to hear it when your partner is having a good time? So pay them the same respect and speak up when you’re enjoying yourself. Something as simple as a little moan, or even saying something like, “that feels so good,” will encourage them and educate them further on your moan zones.
9. Mechanical act
It may feel comfortable to you to pump away like you do at the gym, but you’ll quickly discover that most people don’t enjoy such an act. Mix it up a little bit; go fast at times, then slowly. Be creative and you’ll find yourself enjoying some variation too.
10. Pretending to have an orgasm
A lot of women are guilty of this. We have enough movies and examples that highlight how ladies fake orgasms. It’s true that the orgasm of a woman is still a big mystery for many but that does not mean it should be a fake one. The main reason being, the partner would, some day or the other, get to know this and he would definitely not like it.
11. Jokes about private parts
Not everyone is well endowed when it comes to private parts. Laughing or cracking a joke about a partner’s private part may make him or her feel uncomfortable and it will only ruin the mood. Refrain from giving negative comments on private parts while having sex.
12. Comparing a lover with an ex
There can be no bigger turn off than comparing a partner with an ex-lover during sex. No matter how wonderful sex life you might have had with an ex-partner, mentioning it while having sex is not going to help anyone.
5 Things you should do while having sex
Kissing is the key – If you’re one of those who does not believe in kissing while having sex, then you’re truly missing out on the simple yet grand pleasures of life. While stimulation and physical touch is of utmost importance during sex, kissing adds an erotic satisfaction to the entire experience.
Foreplay is must – Foreplaying is an act that precedes the act of sex itself. It helps to trigger the psychological and physical responses in a person that increases the level of arousal in a person and enhances their sexual urges. If you still feel you’re doing it all wrong, then resort to the pleasures of foreplay.
Locate your best sex positions – Not everyone enjoys the same sexual position. Different positions guarantee different levels of orgasmic pleasures to various people. It is crucial that you locate a compatible yet comfortable position for you and your partner, so that your sexual experience does not become dull and painful.
Express you pleasure – One of the most important part of any sexual activity is talking or expressing your pleasures through something as natural as a pleasurable moan. You could also let them know what and when it feels good, so that they understand what pleases you the most.
Do not forget to experiment – Repeating the same sexual activity can sometimes make your relationship boring and monotonous. What you can do is experiment with different positions or activities that might spice up your experience. Add a little surprise to your sex life the next time you engage. You never know, it might just turn out to be the best sex ever.